Watching three movies in a row is not easy.

There is a line between something actually happened and something actually happened but you don't know it; seconds later moral issues take place in our little brains. In the movie of Three Colours : Red, it explains a bit, it would be all good if you do not know anything, everything is fine until you started to know more or accidentally you just knew it(doesn't matter if the thing directly happened to you, or even none of your business), how you react to it becomes an interruption to you, does it bother you? No matter what you do(or don't do), you will be doing it for your sake. If your "value" tells you the truth is "wrong", would you try to fix it? Oh, it is then because if you don't do anything, you would feel guilty about not doing anything, but if you try to do something(to make yourself feel better), don't you worry you would affect, break or destroy something beyond the matter? It is hard and huge to break the "norm" of relationships, people's lives, and societies. So you better not doing anything, be quiet, keep things to yourself, your thinkings and feelings would eventually get corrupted and corroded, and there you go, you become just one of "them", "they" make our society, "they" are normal, and "they" are people.

After all, if you feel nothing about what I talk about here, it's simply because either/both my English is really bad, or/and you are a selfish person.

Once again, I am tired..

I worked three days in a row, finally having a little break today, been sleeping all day, these are not important, what made me typing this entry is that I AM TIRED, not the tiredness from work, nor life, it is the tiredness of the moment. Here we go again, moaning like a little boy might be what you are thinking, go back to facebook would be a good act in that case. Or stay with me to know a bit more of me. I am telling upfront, this entry is not about "I am tired of work, I wish I had more days off, so I can ...", so here goes,

I really enjoy working, especially this one, I have been learning a lot from this place, The Walk (cafe), (I am not sucking up, I am sure my boss or my colleagues won't access here, if not, good for them) this place makes me want to run a cafe pretty much like this (in Hong Kong), good news huh?? I always wanted to run my own business, but not in catering, so this is a brand new idea to my list. Besides, I would love to run it with my best friend, so he will have A reason to come by.

Yes, I AM TIRED, (focus!) when I don't have to work and when I just have a minute, I would be doing what I always do - THINKING, thinking about the past, digging something to laugh about, to frown a bit, to mad at. These days I am thinking what makes ME, what happened in the history to happen having me here. Apart from my lovely parents "making love" 23 years ago, but any one of you had put a afford into this subject matter, this is what I talked about with someone. You don't have to know all of them to become my friends of course, but when I was telling, I reviewed my past, and I realised really, not even few of you know about some "tragedies" that happened around me. I am not doing advertising here, obviously I know some people think of me being arrogant/cocky, indifferent, moody, ETC (well, yea I do know that). Now I know more about what makes a "nowadays" me when I think of WHAT HAPPENED.

People easily understand other people but not themselves, so I assume you all know me very well (if you care), but you just feel annoyed about my flaws by not trying to know the ingredients(reasons) of today-me [you don't have to, I know]. But lets make our lives more interesting, start finding the "ingredients" of people you really care around you, may be your life would be more fun, at least easier?

If any one of my family (including me) did(do) this, I wouldn't have shouted on the phone tonight.

四月六日的一個如果

如果我在這個有太陽的下午的某一刻

從元朗廣場二樓朗屏方向推門踏出行人天橋，

行前十五步， 身向右面一轉靠在欄杆，望向喜利

你覺得我會在想甚麼？

你們都已在你們自己傳記中新一頁開始了一陣子了

忙著你們的，大概想著你們想要的，

我在近五年前逃離了當時大家都擁有的世界，

來到了這一刻我身處的這個空間裡，

你們曾嚮往過，或者從不關心，毫不在乎我這個世界吧。

這一刻我不是在嘆息，只是在不想工作的時刻，

做一個假設。 假如我這五年刻畫在我腦海中的東西都是假的，

我不在的五年，你們的世界是怎樣演變的？現在又是怎樣的？

這一刻我在想，我不怕再到一個新的國家去冒險，去開一個新的開始，

但，如果很快我便要回到五年前我離開的一天去拾起 以前

去開始五年後這一刻的生活，我要怎樣去調息，

這個陌生了五年的世界會接受我嗎？

如果你在一個有太陽的下午的某一刻

從元朗廣場二樓朗屏方向推門踏出行人天橋，

行前十五步， 身向右面一轉靠在欄杆，望向喜利 你會在想甚麼？

A new starting here

It must be more than a year of my last entry of my blog somewhere else, and apparently blogger is very convenient, so why not giving it a go?

Not only my blog, it seems like I just stopped writing anything in my life (except for taking orders from customers at the cafe). Now when I think back, of course I feel like my memories are fading away, I can only chase them from my photographs, which is a perfect thing to do in one's leisure time, yea, but I don't have leisure time.

So just start "writing" something here when I could to continue recording my life. Sad? probably in some people's eyes. If you have already read to this far, you should probably just keep updating my blog :)

Today is Easter Eve, I just experienced how people prepared to celebrate the reborn of Jesus, traditional, homey, and exotic.